Fellowshipaholic

I found out yesterday that two fellow alcoholibarecs (people I care about and who want recovery,) are being sponsored by someone considered to be a “fellowshipaholic”.  In other words, he’s not in the program for recovery, he’s hanging around because he would otherwise be lonely.  I have never heard him share from the book.  He shares gleefully about defying his own sponsor.  Let me state without hesitation that judging others is something I struggle with and a character defect that can shut me off from my higher power in a heartbeat.  When I heard that this man was sponsoring others I was more sad than angry.  It took every bit of self restraint I could muster not to play God here, as I am so wont to do.  See, the source was none other than one of the sponsees themselves.  My mind went to the recurring suggestion that has been put in front of me so recently:  let God be God.  I asked if the man had been taking them through the work.  The answer was as I expected; no, they meet for meals, shoot the breeze and in rare instances talk on the phone.  One of the sponsees is newly sober.  This is none of my business, right?  No action to take.  No hand has reached out to me.  I think the serenity prayer is in order here.  It wouldn’t hurt to run it by my sponsor, see if she thinks action is necessary.  I sure would hate to see that guy drink because his program of recovery consists of what the fortune cookie said after the buffet dinner.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Fellowshipaholic

  1. I have found that people like this, self-seekers, find themselves on the outside looking in. As for those they sponsor most do not stay. They are not able to endure the emotional upheavals life can offer. The solution is on their end, at some point if they stick around long enough they will gain a sense of something not being right and hopefuly find someone who has their best interests in mind.

  2. This is a hard one. As a recovering alcoholic, I’d hate to see someone go out simply because their “sponsor” was not sponsoring them. As you know, when you’re so new in AA, nothing makes sense.

    I’m sitting here, and I’m struggling to come up with some answer. I certainly think you should pray on this, say the Serenity Prayer, and trust that there are enough people in the room to guide this “newbie” along.

    All the best to you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s